VOICES OF THE VILLAGE PEOPLE: What your cat thinks of YOU having sex.

” So – on the back of the ‘Doggie on the bed’ escapades – I am a cat person, she sleeps on the bed. We also have a dog, who sleeps in the lounge. On Saturday night said cat missed her curfew – and got locked out at bedtime. She proceeded to wake us with a catfight of note at 4am right outside our window. Hubby jumps up to open the window, by now doggie is also in on it and wants to go out for a pee. Both hubby and doggie go out to pee and cat immediately darts in, he leaves them both in the lounge, closes our door. All back to normal. Fast forward to 7-30ish …… as it’s Sunday AND Mother’s Day, hubby, of course, wants to ‘do the wicked thing’ (as he calls it) and because it’s Sunday IT doesn’t have to be the usual ‘quickie’ we have on any other day that isn’t Sunday! So I get up and check teen is still asleep and door closed. I close and lock our door (foreplay …  as was mentioned in other post!) Knickers off and I jump on the bed….. EXCEPT not knowing cat had already been on the bed and gone again. (In the short space of foreplay!) I am trying to decipher what exactly IS on the bed next to my hubby’s foot??? It seems that, during the melee at 4am dear kitty had an accident – very unlike her – and left what was left of it on our bed! I look at hubby – he looks at me with a ‘ it wasn’t me ‘ look on his face and then pure wonder when he realises I think it’s him! It is a small 1cm turd and a few smudges! TALK ABOUT A PASSION KILLER! After the laughs and exclamations I now apparently ‘owe’ hubby a Mother’s Day not so quickie ‘quickie’ as it never did happen this past Sunday! Fair and Not? I’m not sure if I am looking forward to next Sunday or not! True story! PS There will be no updates.”

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